He Said, She Said: The 1L Moot

He Said: THE 1L MOOT: Oral Advocacy is both an Art and a Science
Stephen Dugandzic (2L)

It seems like just yesterday my co-counsel and I successfully argued the merits of overturning the court of first instance’s finding that a post-contractual variation unsupported by fresh consideration could never be rendered enforceable between the parties. To accomplish this on appeal, we had to persuade the court to depart from strict application of the traditional common law requirement of consideration; we faced an uphill battle without any binding case law. Read more

He Said, She Said: 1L Mid-term Exams

She Said: Mid-terms are worth it
Kelly Thompson (1L)

I cannot say that I enjoyed my first set of law school exams – I think you would be hard-pressed to find someone who would say that. But I think, in the end, they have turned out to be a beneficial experience which will help me moving forward. The biggest benefit was getting my CANs in gear. Read more

He Said, She Said: Law School Readings

The Road to Gold – A Former Medalist’s Approach to Law School Readings
Nolan Ritzel (2L)

To read, or not to read, that is the question. Wait, is that the question? Err, I don’t know, I forgot to do that reading…
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He Said, She Said: 1L So Far

Jill Wheat (1L)

I cannot say that first year law school has been much of a surprise so far. It has been lots of work, lots of learning and even more fun. Classes have been just as expected: some I enjoy, some I struggle with and some would be a lot more fun if taught by a more engaging professor. The most difficult hurdle to overcome with regards to the academic side of law school has been fear of the unknown. Looming in the near future, law exams are frightening, uncharted territory. Thankfully, upper years students are full of comforting advice, which is helpful, but not completely effective at easing exam anxiety.
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He Said, She Said: 1L Summering

He Said: Summer!
Lamont Bartlett (3L/MBA)

The question of whether or not to summer after first year has been a staple in the Canons since I entered law school 2 years ago. Having had the opportunity to face the first-year summering decision two summers in a row (Thank you JD/MBA program), I am in the unique position to comment on both the pros and the cons of first-year summer positions. After weighing the alternatives, I’m strongly in favour of summering for the following reasons.

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He Said/She Said: The Articling Experience

He Said
John Gilbert LL.B

When the magnanimous Jason Buttuls asks you to come out of retirement and write a Canons article about articling, there is only one answer. After he calms you down and makes you stop screaming profanity at him, you will eventually feel guilty about the way you reacted and accede. You will also make Dana write something too. Here goes:
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Pets Do’s and Don’ts

Imane Semaine, 2L

I don’t own any pets. I can barely take care of myself. I consider Fruitloops an acceptable dinner and walking to HUB mall rigorous exercise. I by no means feel I should drag some innocent creature into this mess. Despite this, over the years I have noticed a few “do’s” and “don’ts” of pet ownership that I would like to share with you.

For starters, DO post pictures of your pets doing cute and crazy things on Facebook. That’s fine. But, DO NOT, for the love of God, customize your sweaters, totes or t-shirts with pictures of your cat(s). I’m not sure if this problem exists elsewhere, or if it’s just endemic to Edmonton, but it’s very unsettling.
If you’re a single lady DO NOT own more than 3 cats. I know it’s harsh, but I say this because I care. The world isn’t ready for you. You know the names you’ll be called behind your back. I’m sorry but its better you hear it now before it’s too late.

Likewise, if you’re a large, muscular man (read: meathead) DO NOT own a Chihuahua. I’ve actually witnessed this in real life, and I’m not just talking about watching Micky Rourke charming the world with his eccentricities. I realize confessing my discomfort at this isn’t exactly ‘progressive,’ but I feel compelled to call it out. Frankly, even Chihuahuas don’t want to be owned by meatheads. In fact, I am convinced Chihuahuas were put on Earth for the sole purpose of being carried around in women’s purses. The last I heard, fossilized remains of an early prehistoric Chihuahua were recently found in what appears to be in a primitive rock Gucci clutch. Meatheads everywhere offend fashion rules daily with their shocking array of wife beaters, and bedazzled jeans, but ownership of Chihuahuas goes too far and constitutes a crime against fashion-humanity. My advice to meatheads: man-up and put the Chihuahua down.

If you own a dog, DO NOT let it sleep in your bed, lick your face, or help you eat your ice cream cones. This is unhygienic. I recently watched an episode of “House” in which a patient contracted the black plague from her dog. A little Google research confirmed that there were two reported cases of black plague in the United States last year. How did it happen? Was it bioterrorism or Al Qaeda? Nope, it was the family dog.

Finally, DO pick up after your dog if you take it for a walk. The last I checked, the ‘fairies’ that pick up after your doggie ‘gifts’ only exist in Narnia. And, by the way, frozen feces don’t miraculously evaporate by spring.

Despite everything I’ve just said, if you have the time, resources, love, and patience for a pet, DO go and adopt one, especially from the local Humane Society where the animals are in need of good homes. Although they are a lot of work (work which I myself cannot commit to) I know they are worth the effort.

Take Care of Yourself First

Not a Zoo, 2L

It is tempting to many to stave off loneliness with the companionship of an adorable dog/cat/snake/piranha. And I understand the appeal. Having something else living in your apartment, that depends on you and cuddles with you (although not so much in the case of the piranha) is an opportunity that’s hard to pass up. The problem is that people tend to act before they think when it comes to animals. With even a millisecond’s logical thought, it’s clear that adopting a pet is a bad idea.

Dogs and/or cats are the first obvious choice. Dogs, in my opinion, are slightly more work. They will actually be upset when you’re not around and you have to take them for walks. Every day. I suppose you could tether your dog to a treadmill like Cesar Milan makes those fat dogs do on “The Dog Whisperer”…but seriously. SERIOUSLY. And how exciting does a -250 walk with an excitable furry friend, where you have to wait for, and cart around its poop, sound?

Cats are slightly more manageable. Really, as long as you provide a cat with some food, love, and a clean litter box, they are happy. And you will be rewarded with itchy, sneezy cat hairs hiding on every surface and peppering all of your suits. When you bring home an adorable kitten no one mentions the fortune you will spend on lint removers and vacuum filters. And I’m not sure how many of you have heard of toxoplasmosis. Google that s*&%.

Naïve pet-owner wannabes will often turn to animals they see as being “low maintenance” – fish, reptiles, rodents. They will be sadly disappointed upon realizing “low maintenance” means that you now have an animal that sits around, doesn’t give a hoot about your existence, AND, unless you want a foggy, nasty fish aquarium or the smell of rodent urine permeating your apartment, you have to clean its cage and feed it on a weekly basis. Don’t be misled by online forums for exotic pet owners. A “clean” pet that can be “litter trained” MAY still REALLY enjoy pooping on the run, on a wheel in its cage – which now has to be cleaned every day. Just a warning.

New exotic pet owners are often surprised by the problem of live food. Squeamishness aside, something often overlooked is the care and maintenance of your pet’s food. I am thinking specifically of crickets. They need food. And water. You have to buy them at least every couple of weeks, unless you want to start breeding them yourself. And if you thought the sound of crickets chirping all night long would be romantic, I assure you, it’s NOT.

I can’t even fit all my reasons for not owning a pet within my word limit. The bottom line: pets are a lot of work. In some cases for little reward. They live a long time, and once you have one, if you’re a decent person, you’re stuck with it. Give it some thought.

She Said: Travel!

Guinevere (Guin) Loi, 3L

I’m back in Edmonton after four months of traveling in Southeast Asia and Australia. I have been planning to go on exchange since my first year of law school and I spent last semester studying in Hong Kong. Spending a term abroad was one of the best decisions that I have made and I encourage you to take advantage of this opportunity.

1. Enhance your language skills. The most efficient way to learn a new language is to talk to native speakers, watch popular soap operas and listen to local music like K-pop.

2. Experience a different culture first hand. If you want to, you can try something new every day whether it is skydiving or having dim sum.

3. Make friends around the globe. This will give you an excuse to visit them in their home countries and possibly stay there for free!

4. Take classes that aren’t offered at the U of A. You can learn the law from a different perspective and get a better understanding of Canadian law by comparison.

5. Increase your employment opportunities. Potential employers look favorably upon experiences gained overseas and will likely ask you about them during interviews.

6. Pass/Fail Courses. Courses are approved ahead of time so they are guaranteed to transfer back to the U of A (if you pass all of them). Instead of a letter grade, a “CR” for credit will appear on your transcript.

7. Free Tuition? The Education Abroad Office offers awards and funding for student to go on exchange. A tuition waiver covers the equivalent of five 3-credit courses at the U of A. That means more money to go travel. Even without funding, you would just pay the regular U of A tuition fees.

8. Travel. The best thing about going on exchange is being able to travel and see the world. Depending on your budget and class schedule, you can go to a different country every other week. This will also allow you to post many Facebook albums and constantly update your status with exotic destinations.

The next time you trudge through -50 degree weather for another date with your McGill Guide and Timmy’s on the third floor of the law library, you should consider going on exchange. You could be surfing in Brazil, riding elephants in Thailand or skiing in Switzerland.

He Said: “This is a Shocker”

Graham Purse, 3L

(Editor’s Note: This is one of the best submissions I’ve ever received, enjoy!)

Thinking of Going Abroad? Stay home.

Obviously, there are powerful countervailing forces when one decides whether to go abroad: for argument’s sake, I will ignore the pros.

Edmonton Rocks. It’s a great city with great concerts, great sports, and an acceptably bourgeois nightlife. Sure, the winters are cruel, but eight months of the year are palatable. And when you are in Canada, the all-knowing governments subsidize everything perfectly with its untold prescience: hooray for utopia! You’d never find that abroad.

Also, the profs here are great. They’re generally intellectually intimidating – some of them sublimely so. What are you going to find abroad? More professors who have thought about the law in much more depth than yourself, making you feel like the puisne intellectual weakling that you are.

Travel is overrated, too. Go to a beach, look at some worn out building that was used for something that somebody once thought was important to someone, get drunk, see art for which rich people would be willing to pay too much if it were auctioned at Sotheby’s, and maybe get a venereal disease from a soul mate you first met last night at a Glaswegian discothèque. Really, why travel?

Consider for a moment the etymology of the word: travel is truly work! The voyage itself subjects you to the TSA or CATSA’s unwanted sexual advances, and then there is a Spanish-style inquisition at your customary customs-area welcome home. Also, why do babies have rights? Couldn’t we relegate them to steerage at the back of the plane?

And the classes. Good grief. What are you going to study abroad? Botswanan Maritime Law? Shaman Malpractice Torts? Law, Gender, and Estonian Colonialism? Mayan Perpetuities Reforms? Exobiological Constraints on Interstellar Law? Obfuscation and the Law? The Endor Holocaust: A Second-Wave Feminist, Post-Modern Critique? The possibilities are endless – and fruitless.

Sure, travel can be fun, but please stop trying to convince yourself that doing a semester abroad somehow will advance your legal education or help you blossom into a better, more culturally-rarefied ignoramus. If you are independently wealthy or a spoiled trust-fund kid, by all means have fun gallivanting around the world, but recognize that it is just that.

Me, I’d rather be here learning Canadian appellate-level jurisprudence, cause that’s all that I’m planning on practicing.

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